Wednesday, October 6, 2004

Osama bin Laden’s Disappointment

by Steve Ray on October 6, 2004

Osama bin Laden couldn’t wait to get to heaven. Everyone in his group of terrorist had been working toward martyrdom in order to gain the 72 beautiful virgins waiting for them in heaven as they had been promised.

After his death, Osama bin Laden rushed to the pearly gates. There he was greeted by George Washington, who proceeded to slap him across the face and yell at him, “How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!”

Patrick Henry approached and punched Osama in the nose and shouted, “You wanted to end our liberties but you failed.”

James Madison entered, kicked Osama in the groin and said, “This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!”

Thomas Jefferson came in and proceeded to beat Osama many times with a long cane and said, “It was evil men like you that provided me the inspiration to pen the Declaration of Independence!”.

These beatings and thrashings continued as John Rudolph, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans came in and unleashed their anger on the Muslim terrorist leader.

As Osama lay bleeding and writhing in unbearable pain, an Angel appeared. Bin Laden wept in pain and said to the Angel, “This is not what I was promised!” The Angel replied, “You were told that there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in heaven. What did you think God said?”

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